Everyone on General Hospital wants Baby Ace, but Esme Prince insists on keeping her son with her — even in prison. Spencer wants his baby brother. Laura and Kevin seem like the most sensible guardians. And you know Heather is planning something for that toddler-sized newborn. But most of that is predicated on the assumption that Ace is Nikolas’s child. And we’re left wondering: Why does everyone assume Esme is telling the truth?

Honest General Hospital Mistake

For those who believe that Esme (Avery Kristen Pohl) isn’t faking her amnesia, well, then, why do you also believe she is accurate when naming Ace’s biological father? Sure, that’s what she said before. But she was a lying liar who lies then. Maybe Esme is lying now — and doesn’t even realize it.

Esme Prince: Deliberate Mistake

For those who believe that Esme is faking her amnesia, well, then, why would you believe that she is telling the truth about Nik (Adam Huss) being Ace’s father? Yes, Esme slept with Nik. But she was also gone for weeks before returning pregnant. Which means Ace could be anybody’s baby.

GH: Proof Perfect

But whether Esme is lying or telling the truth, why is anyone taking her word as gospel? Before Ace’s custody is determined, shouldn’t a DNA test be run? Actually, two DNA tests. One, to figure out if Ace is even a Cassadine, to see if any member of that clan has a claim on him. And two, to figure out if Esme really is the biological child of Ryan (Jon Lindstrom) and Heather (Alley Mills).

Sure, Ryan said so. And Heather said so. But they are both loons. Loons with agendas. Ryan could be playing Esme, and Heather could be playing Ryan, and Ryan could be playing Heather, and the point is, WHY IS EVERYONE IN PORT CHARLES SUDDENLY SO TRUSTING? Use some science, people!